Hi, my name is Tina. I want to share with you all about a wonderful journey I’m on and how it all started. Many years ago someone very close to me struggled with a pregnancy loss and infertility. My heart hurt for her in so many ways. How do I comfort her? How do I continue to be happy and excited about my pregnancy while she just lost hers? What can I do for her? How can I help her? Well it took many, many years and a Facebook group for me to have my answer and to find what I believe to be my true passion. While my friend was able to have 4 amazingly wonderful children of her own, I know the journey for her to get there wasn’t an easy one.
This opened my eyes to the struggle many couples face, infertility. I reached out to a Facebook group to inquire about surrogacy. To my wonderful surprise there was an unbelievable supportive response with many wonderful stories about surrogacy. This eventually led me to an agency, IARC (International Assisted Reproduction Center), where my journey began in 2015. I cannot even begin to tell you how many questions I got from family and friends when I told them I wanted to be a surrogate. “How can you carry a baby for 9 months and just give it away”, “Why don’t these people just adopt”, “Why do you want to do this”, “Is it going to be hard to give the baby up”, “Are they using your egg”, “What does your husband think about you doing this? What about your kids”. To answer these questions, it was my husband who brought up the idea of surrogacy to me (although not entirely his idea, I still let him believe it was!) He’s very supportive not only of me but also for the intended parents. My teenagers think it’s weird but cool, and my younger kids are excited that mommy is going to help someone have a baby. **BONUS** this also teaches my kids about compassion, love for one another, and how someone can make a difference. Sure I could use my own eggs if I choose, but that’s not for me. I have chosen to be a gestational carrier-this is where the IP’s use their genetics or that of a donor and I’m just the carrier for them. But for those who can be a traditional surrogate, more love and support to you! This brings us to those questions about ‘giving the baby away and will it be hard’? Well first off I went into surrogacy knowing I am helping someone else. This child isn’t mine and was never intended to be mine, so to be able to handover the baby to its parents and to see the joy, the love, the fulfillment of their heart, this to me is what surrogacy is all about and why I have chosen to become a surrogate!!
That all being said, the road to being matched with IP’s is intense. There is a lot of screening, doctor approval, documents, forms, serious questions about abnormalities and termination, questions that I would have never thought of! Then there’s finding the right IP’s for you….but once you have that, you form a connection, a love, a bond with them that makes them a part of your family and forever in your heart.
My first match was with intended parents from China. Unfortunately our journey ended before it really began. We still keep in touch and if things change and they need a surrogate, I plan on being there for them again! I am now matched with IP’s from Israel. Talk about exposing my children to the world and the amazing cultures of others. So now this brings me to where I am currently….waiting on lab results so that I can begin my medication protocol.
I look forward to sharing this journey with you!
Until next time,